I Love to See the Temple

Oh yes. It is true, I do indeed love to see the temple.

Today we went to the temple. Oh how it was nice to be back inside that Holy building. I kept thinking about my future and what it was I needed to be doing. No, I had no sudden revelation. I was not told exactly what my future entails. Nor was I guided in the right direction. My mind is having a huge battle with itself, and sometimes I just want to turn it off.

Do I do this? Do I do that? HOW DO I KNOW WHAT IS RIGHT FOR ME?!!? I don't. But that is where faith comes in. I just have to trust in the Lord and everything will work out. The same thought kept coming back into my head, though, as I was sitting in the temple. It was "Be still, and know that I am God." D & C 101:16. Through all the craziness, and weird stuff going on in my life, all I need to remember is that He is God, and He knows what He is doing.

"Trust in the Lord with all thine heart, and lean not unto thine own understanding." Proverbs 3:5

So if I don't know anything else, I hope that is the one thing I do know. The Lord knows all, and He will help me see what I am capable of, all in due time.

Answers

Hm.... What to say now? The moment I've waited two years for has come and gone. Now what do I look forward to? Okay, there were several moments that helped pass the days. And now, I won't be receiving letters either. I love getting mail, I think that's the best part about having a writing buddy, you always have mail. Maybe I should write my other friends...

I get to go do Baptisms for the Dead on Friday night at the St. George Temple. I'm rather excited. It's been a long time since I've gone to the temple, maybe I will get my answer as I am sitting and pondering in that Holy place. To serve a mission, or not to serve. That is the question. I still don't know if that is what the Lord wants me to do. Mom keeps saying that sometimes you don't find out if it's the right thing until you are in the MTC. And I asked her well what if I get told that it isn't the right things when I get there. She said, "If it's doing a good thing, then it's going to be right." Touche Mom.

Anyway, my papers are all done, I just need the physical and the interview from my Stake President. Then they can be sent away. Yipee!

And the Answer is No

So I did it. The last time I asked a boy this, I got over him faster. Problem solved.

What did I ask him? If there was any possibility of a future. He said No. And I said.. Okay, that's what I needed to hear. Now all flames of hope have been extinguished, and my heart can move on.

He taught me a lot of things, and helped make me a better person. That's the best I could ask for.

Oddly enough, I feel like I'm having an out-of-body experience. I know he means it, yet I'm okay with it. Maybe it will hit me tomorrow, maybe it won't come at all. All I know is it's over. Seven years of wondering, put to rest.

I'm a Loser

So... I need someone to vent to, and well, writing always helps so that is how I ended up here.

I have been writing this kid for his entire mission. He asked me to when he first left, and we were good enough friends that I, of course, said yes. That was my first mistake. Did I mention I've liked this kid nearly all of my life? What on earth did I get myself into?

Well, now he is home, and we haven't talked yet. Every single one of his letters told me how glad he was that I was writing him. He was so thankful for our friendship. What's a girl to think? *sigh* Of course I got sucked in, with his charm, his knowledge of the gospel, the fact that he has every quality I want in a husband, and I know him quite well. I told myself I wouldn't let this happen. Yet here I am, placed on his backburner, and forgotten about.

Of course, there is a Beatles song for everything... So here it is. "I'm a Loser"

I'm a loser
I'm a loser
And I'm not what I appear to be

Of all the love I have won or have lost
there is one love I should never have crossed
She [he] was a girl [boy] in a million, my friend
I should have known she [he] would win in the end

I'm a loser
And I lost someone who's near to me
I'm a loser
And I'm not what I appear to be

Although I laugh and I act like a clown
Beneath this mask I am wearing a frown
My tears are falling like rain from the sky
Is it for her [him] or myself that I cry

I'm a loser
And I lost someone who's near to me
I'm a loser
And I'm not what I appear to be

What have I done to deserve such a fate
I realize I have left it too late
And so it's true, pride comes before a fall
I'm telling you so that you won't lose all

I'm a loser
And I lost someone who's near to me
I'm a loser
And I'm not what I appear to be

New Title

So... I decided that A Day in the Life was getting old, and I've decided that this journey I'm on is more of a long and winding road.

Of which, both of these titles are Beatles songs, so I'm still staying true to my love of the Beatles. :)

And now, The Long and Winding Road

The long and winding road
That leads to your door
Will never disappear
I've seen that road before
It always leads me here
Lead me to your door.

The wild and windy night
That the rain washed away
Has left a pool of tears
Crying for the day.
Why leave me standing here?
Let me know the way.


Many times I've been alone
And many times I've cried,
Anyway you'll never know
The many ways I've tried.


And still they lead me back
To the long, winding road
You left me standing here
A long, long time ago
Don't leave me waiting here
Lead me to your door.

But still they lead me back
To the long winding road
You left me standing here
A long, long time ago (ohhh)
Don't keep me waiting here (don't keep me waiting)
Lead me to your door. (yeah yeah yeah yeah)

He Is We

My friend has introduced me to a new band. And I really like them a lot. If you've never heard of them, you better look them up. They're pretty good. The band is called "He Is We".

This is their song, "Happily Ever After"


Let me riddle you a ditty, it's just an itty bitty, little thing on my mind.
About a boy and a girl, trying to take on the world one kiss at a time.
Now the funny thing about, ain't a story without it, but the story is mine.
And I wish you could say, that it ended just fine.

We all want to know, how it ends.

Oh, happily ever after, wouldn't you know, wouldn't you know.
Oh, skip to the ending, who'd like to know, I'd like to know.
Author of the moment, can you tell me, do I end up, do I end up happy?

Inhale, breathe steady, exhale, like you're ready, if you're ready or not.
Just a boy and a girl trying to take on the world, and we want to get caught.
In the middle of a very happy ending, let's see what we've got, let's give it a shot.
Let's give it a shot.

We all want to know, how it ends.

Oh, happily ever after, wouldn't you know, wouldn't you know.
Oh, skip to the ending, who'd like to know, I'd like to know.
Author of the moment, can you tell me, do I end up, do I end up happy?

We all have a story to tell.
Whether we whisper or yell.
We all have a story, of adolescence and all it's glory.
We all have a story to tell.

Oh, happily ever after, wouldn't you know, wouldn't you know.
Oh, skip to the ending, who'd like to know, I'd like to know.
Author of the moment, can you tell me, do I end up, do I end up happy?

We all have a story to tell.
We all have a story to tell.
We all have a story to tell.
We all have a story to tell.

I'm So Lucky!

WELCOME TO THE WORLD TIMOTHY DONALD!!!!

Yes, I have a new nephew, and he is he cutest thing on this planet... Except for maybe his siblings (and Thomas); he definitely comes from a cute family. :) He was born February 17th at 3:17 in the morning. He is 8 lbs 2 oz and 22 inches long! I am so excited for him to be part of their family, and in turn, my family.