Healing

So I thought I'd update you all, even if you don't really care. I do, and I've read that putting this on the internet is a good way of keeping you on task. Because you are more accountable with unknown people reading your blog. So because of that, I'm sharing. If don't want like it, don't read it. As simple as that...

Anyway, today was the first day of eating real food again. I don't know how it will go down, but I think I've got it. I think I might have a control over things. I made spaghetti with whole wheat pasta, and I ate the right serving size. I think with my serious cut back the last two weeks, I have finally learned that, yes! I am full with the correct serving size. I am not hungry, nor do I have the desire to eat anything. I am bored, but I don't have the desire to eat anything.

I was going to post this yesterday, but I forgot and got super busy. BUT, this is what I was feeling yesterday. For the first time, I was feeling hope. I was finally feeling the happiness that comes from having prayers answered. I have always been someone who knew the Atonement was real, and yes, it works... But always thought it was for someone else. I always thought I had to do this on my own. I have been lying to myself for the last 20 years of my life. This isn't true, and I don't have to do it on my own. I am finally feelings the effects of serious prayer and fasting, because I am finally allowing it into my life. It's been there all along, I just never let it in. I felt joy, and happiness. And I felt so much love from my Father in Heaven. I can do this, and I will succeed.

My testimony of prayer and fasting has grown leaps and bounds in just two weeks. Everything seems so real to me now. The power of prayer and fasting is amazing, and I know it is real. Heavenly Father wants us to be happy, and succeed, and the only way we can do that is if we allow Him into our lives. Allow Him to help us. Every night I thank my Heavenly Father for helping me through that day. Helping me succeed that day. Which gives me more strength and courage to take on the next day. If I didn't fail the day before, I won't fail today either.

I ate some cookies last Sunday. Normally, I would have thought, "Oops, I messed up. Oh well, I guess that means I can just give up." I didn't do that. Monday morning came, and I was right back to my strict diet, and nothing swayed me. I was so proud of myself, as well as asking again for the Lord's help. I was able to bounce back, and carry on. It was great!